


breathe

by transpeterparker (partlycharlie)



Series: pride month 2k19 [6]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Fluff, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Genderqueer Bruce Banner, Genderqueer Character, Meditation, Mindfulness Exercises, Nonverbal Communication, Other, Rivers, Transgender Bruce Banner, bruce is fine he just goes nonverbal bc he was meditating, this is the calmest thing i've ever written i think
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-09
Updated: 2019-06-09
Packaged: 2020-04-23 20:27:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19158385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/partlycharlie/pseuds/transpeterparker
Summary: Bruce is barefoot, they note absently, toes wiggling into the earth below the grass. There are tiny clovers in front of them, waving slightly in the breeze - dandelions up ahead, yellow and bright - asters, daffodils, freesias, snapdragons, flowers they can’t identify scattered around the edges, bright but subtle enough that Bruce doesn’t feel forced to pay attention to them.





	breathe

**Author's Note:**

> i had prom yesterday so i didn't write but hello friends! look at me! doing the thing! i love bruce banner is what i'm saying here
> 
> hope yall enjoy
> 
> (sorry i say yall so much for a yank)

They close their eyes -

\- and imagine.

_You are walking in a forest and you come to a clearing. Describe it - what does the grass feel like?_

Smooth grass spreads across the clearing - long blades, the type that fold when you step on them and spring back up when you move, so that it looks like you hadn’t been there at all.

_Are there flowers?_

Bruce is barefoot, they note absently, toes wiggling into the earth below the grass. There are tiny clovers in front of them, waving slightly in the breeze - dandelions up ahead, yellow and bright - asters, daffodils, freesias, snapdragons, flowers they can’t identify scattered around the edges, bright but subtle enough that Bruce doesn’t feel forced to pay attention to them.

_Animals? What types?_

There’s a deer up ahead, staring at Bruce with calm eyes. They bend slowly, hands spread out low to the ground in front of them, smiling softly. She walks toward them, head tilting, knees knobbling, stopping in front of them and folding her legs underneath her, not making a sound. Bruce stretches out their left hand an inch and she leans forward, tucking her head underneath. 

They let out a breath -

_Now continue walking._

\- and imagine.

_You come across a body of water. What type of water is it?_

They’re standing in front of a lake - slow, lazy, the sun bright but not harsh, bouncing off of the water on the little waves echoing.

_Is it calm or harsh? Are there other people in the water?_

They see them, suddenly, when they hadn’t before - 

Tony, lying on a wooden deck, feet dangling in the water -

Steve, sitting next to Tony, back hunched over a sketchbook -

Clint, the only part of him visible his feet, ankle bracelet and painted purple toenails and all, doing a handstand in the shallow water -

Peter, floating under the sun next to the deck, grinning wildly at Tony -

Natasha, in a float, smiling serenely -

Thor, sitting on a float connected to hers, hands spread wide, in the middle of a fantastical story -

Bruce sees them all, and they see them too, smiling at them but not beckoning, not forcing them to join.

_Are there animals in the water?_

They hear, suddenly, the light tinkling of birds chirping, the scampering of squirrels, the slow movement of ducks on the other side of the lake, the rustling of leaves behind them.

They listen - 

_Now breathe. In: one, two, three, four - hold: one, two, three, four - out: one, two, three, four - hold: one, two, three, four. Repeat. Feel your muscles, from your forehead to your toes. Recognize your breathing, the flickering of your eyes - press two fingers to the inside of your wrist. Feel your heartbeat. Acknowledge the sounds around you. Come back up._

\- and open their eyes.

Tony’s sitting across from them, tablet in his lap, bluetooth tucked into his ear. He’s speaking to someone on the other line (“- yes, I’m aware that this is incredibly important to you, Miss Gustav, but I’m afraid I’m in the middle of a highly sensitive experiment that I cannot move away from - no, coming to see me would not be better - Miss Gustav, I can assure you Miss Potts would be better equipped to handle this -”), eyes twinkling and staring straight into Bruce’s.

“Alright, Miss Gustav. Yes - yes, of course, you too. Alright. You too. Okay.” He hangs up and smiles at Bruce. “Hello there. You back up?”

Bruce nods, wordless.

“Good. It’s 4:43 PM - you were under for three hours, give or take. I imagine you’re hungry?” Bruce nods. “Good. I asked Steve to make some grilled cheeses when I heard your breathing start to change, so I’ll go down soon to grab them. You feeling okay?”

They tilt their head, side to side. _Not quite sure._

“Not sure yet? That’s fine. Take your time, notice your body and your mind. I’m going to go get thoe sandwiches.” Tony leans in close, caresses Bruce’s cheek with his hand, cups the back of their head and tucks a kiss to the crown of their hair. Bruce leans into the touch, closes his eyes, smiles. Nods.

“Pronouns?” Tony asks, drawing away. Bruce holds up a fist, thumb tucked in between their index and middle finger. _T._

Tony nods, smiling. “Okay, sweetheart.” He brushes another kiss across their forehead, then stands up, groaning softly as his knees crack. “Never get any younger, I swear. Alright - I’ll be back soon.”

Bruce blinks slow and nods. Tony leaves, flashing one last smile.

They breathe.

They feel the air, recognize they’re on a balcony, smell the freshness of the air a mile above Manhattan. Touch their fingers, forearms, shoulders, chest, stomach. Their thighs, shins, toes. Acknowledge the pain in their ankles, thighs, chest. Let it flow through them. 

Breathe.

**Author's Note:**

> please give me prompts i'm running out of headspace
> 
> love you guys!


End file.
